today’s recounting of events could be subtitled: “Continuation of the Breakdown”, but i’m trying to dwell on the positive. it was really just another day filled with frustratingly failed attempts to control my universe. Africa seems determined to teach me to let go. which is obviously harder for me than Organic Chemistry 201.

since today wasn’t really filled with many exciting events (i spent 4 hours being frustrated, followed by 2 hours soothing myself with chocolate by the pool, followed by a disorienting nap, followed by a HOT shower), i’ll just open up the old stream of consciousness and see what comes out…

evenings and mornings when i first arrived were pleasantly cool after the scorching afternoons. now they are turning downright cold. it’s impossible to sit comfortably on the veranda anytime after 4pm — when the sun dips behind the roof — without a sweater or long sleeves. i have white “V”s on the tops of my feet where flip flops hide my skin from the broiling 2pm sun, but it really is winter in Africa.

as i have mentioned previously, mosquitos don’t seem to be much of a bother this time of year. some of the other girls have been “bugged” (including one girl with nastily infected bites that required generous doses of antibiotics), but i haven’t worn spray once. i have three small bites on the backs of my hands and a few around my ankles, unfortunately right where my socks/shoes rub. ugh. they were ON FIRE during night duty at Dambwa clinic last week. at one point i indulged in a hearty scratch, but we all know that temporary relief always gives way to more intense pain.

speaking of scratching, i like the towels here. they are dried outside in the hot afternoon sun and straightened to a cardboard consistency with the even hotter steam iron. the cotton is rough against my freshly washed skin and feels like i am rubbing frustration out of my pores while drying. an emotional exfoliation of sorts.

Sundays usually bring anticipation of what surprises and events the coming week will hold. today i have no idea what i’m looking forward to. what i’m dreading. i have almost no idea what to expect or how to prepare myself.

i guess that’s the lesson, right?

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