So much to report.

So little desire to pull myself away from this perfect face.

[Originally written last week. You know, before I had any idea this would be my last week of pregnancy.]

I officially installed the baby car seat and puppy pet partition in the 4Runner last weekend. Does this mean we are one more step closer to being ready READY for the little man’s arrival?

Probably not.

Every time someone at work asks me if we’re “ready”, I respond that it’s our first. How can we possibly be “ready”??

And yet, our minds are slowly evolving to accept the inevitability of the arrival of this new life, new responsibility, new person.

Each day this week, Brandon and I have attempted to tackle something new with the baby’s room. First, he surprised me by setting up the crib all by himself last week while I was at yoga. Then we unpacked the combo changing table. Then we moved all of his office stuff from The Baby Room into the dining room. Then we sorted through four ENORMOUS boxes of amazing generosity from Tammy and Cecil and arranged The Baby Room. Then we moved the queen bed from our bedroom into the The Baby Room (in preparation for company coming this fall!) and got a new bed for our bedroom.

In between all of that, we are still busy with hospital rotations and Brandon continues to plug away at his MBA degree and part-time job. I have continued writing a few articles for that online search engine company (they are patiently waiting for my US SSN) and spend each weekend cleaning. In addition to my usual Sunday fun “to do” list, I’m vacuuming spiderwebs from windows and corners and dusting WAY more often.

Are we “nesting”? Probably!

Are we “ready”? Probably not. But by the time he gets here, we’ll have done as much as we can to prepare.

I wish I could think of a title for this post that didn’t have to do with the impending baby-ness. I wish I could think of anything in my life right now that isn’t affected by the impending baby-ness. It’s like a huge, dark cloud that casts shadows of bright and beautiful sunshine-y rainbows over everything. Like looking at your life through a kaleidoscope and not quite understanding how it works, but thinking “dang! that looks cool! and so purdy!”

So yes, this post is supposed to be about school. But somehow it’s about the baby too. Welcome to my baby blog.

It’s a slow morning at the clinic and I thought I’d bring my laptop along. In hindsight, I’m actually not sure why I brought my laptop today. I never bring it to work and prefer to read random textbooks or review notes in my spare time instead. For some reason, I packed the old* iBook G4 in my diaper-bag-turned-bookbag with the thought that I might have some time that needed occupying at some point… We have two hours and 20 minutes between patients. So here I am.

Today is my last day on Neurology. I am closing out the month, this rotation, and my pre-maternity leave elective rotations in one fell swoop just a few short hours from now.

I have completed 18 out of the 30 required elective rotation weeks in my 4th year. When I come back to finish rotations in December(ish), I will have three electives (12 weeks) plus Pedatrics (a 6-week 3rd year core that couldn’t be scheduled earlier) to finish up before I get my MD in June.

To put it another way, I have 18 weeks + 1 day left in this short white medical student coat. Which is a good thing because it’s starting to look a little worn out.

Somewhere in the midst of all that studying I was doing for the USMLE Step 2, I transitioned from a third year medical student to a fourth year. There wasn’t a big momentous marker, but it’s actually kind of a huge deal. I’m in the home stretch! I’m in my LAST YEAR OF MEDICAL SCHOOL. My parents are probably falling out of their chairs with excitement at the thought of me having a PAYCHECK not paying tuition sometime in the near future. I know I can hardly believe it.

Other big changes that come with being a senior fourth year:
- picking which rotations you want to spend time in
- applying for residency programs
- knowing more than you did this time last year when you were just starting out
- moving from “history & physical” skills that you so recently perfected into “assessment & plan” thinking

However, an even bigger transition is just around the corner. The Before and After line in the sand that is about to be drawn down the middle of our lives in a few short weeks is much more definite than the transition between 3rd and 4th year… Very soon, Brandon and I will go from husband-and-wife medical students to mama-and-papa medical students.

Yah. That kaleidoscope. Pretty trippy stuff.

————
*7 years old this fall! As I was preparing to type out the praises of this sturdy and long-lasting machine, it promptly crashed into some sort of unrecoverable mode that required a PMU reset.

I glanced in the rearview mirror of the 4Runner and saw Maddy’s nose sticking out at me through the bars of the freshly-installed pet partition. She and Suh were safely segregated away from the (also freshly-installed) baby car seat. Suh was more than happy to hang her head out of the back window, but Maddy seemed to look longingly at me as if through the bars of a prison.

I felt a twinge of sadness and what might only be described as melancholy as I thought back to the days when Maddy was an only child in a single-parent household. I used to love it when she would rest her head on my shoulder while I drove and she was always close enough to listen to my latest rant or share my McDonald’s french fries. Now she was far away. And there was the shadow of a GIANT tiny new baby between us.

So many things have changed. So many things are continuing to change.

I count my blessings every day, but sometimes I wonder why it all has to happen so fast…

I waddled into work on Monday morning and had two different women that I see on a daily basis tell me that my belly looks like the baby “dropped” over the weekend. I still feel feet in my right ribcage, so who knows if they’re right or not. But it’s inevitable! The day is coming closer!

Speaking of women at work, someone asked me the other day what I’ve been craving. The only thing I can’t seem to live without for the last couple of months is watermelon! Granted, I have also been eating a TON of cereal (finishing about a box a week) and between Brandon and I, we go through more milk than a dairy farm. But watermelon seems to appease my thirst and sweet tooth at the same time. If it had protein and a few more nutrients, it would be the perfect food! This photo shows a watermelon I grew in our backyard. Yum.

This week we have a milestone prenatal appointment. Almost every monthly appointment is the same: check weight, check blood pressure, check dates, pee in a cup (check for protein or glucose), measure distance between pubic symphysis and fundus, and listen to baby’s heartbeat with doppler monitor. But at 36 weeks, you actually have to strip from the waist down and get swabbed for group B streptococcus (GBS). From here on out, we visit the doctor weekly.

I’ve also started paying for yoga on a weekly instead of monthly basis because I’m no longer sure how many classes I’ll get to. It’s inevitable! The day is coming closer!

I have really loved being pregnant. I know I’ve been lucky and blessed by the fact that the biggest thing I had to complain about was a little hip pain for a couple of weeks. Big deal. The hormones have been good to me overall, even if Brandon doesn’t totally agree. ; )

But I think I am just about done with this whole pregnancy thing.

Mostly I’m done with having to wear the same clothes week in and week out. Even those extra-long, extra-tented tees from the maternity department no longer hang low enough to cover the bottom of my belly. I have two pairs of pants that I can wear to work and I can’t wear my capris because I have to don these gosh-awful-ugly compression stockings each morning. It’s summer! I want skirts and dresses and short pants! I broke down the other day and stopped at Payless Shoes on the way home from work. I splurged $24.99 on a pair of comfy black slip-ons that are a FULL size bigger than what I normally wear. The sales clerk reminded me that they have a “buy one, get one 1/2 off” special right now and I told him I just can’t bring myself to buy TWO pairs of giant ski shoes.

I’m also done with feeling so slow — both mentally and physically. Sometimes I have to take a break halfway through getting dressed in the morning! And forget about jaunting up three flights of stairs in the parking garage. Just going to the bathroom seems to take forever as I peel away layer after layer and then get myself sorted again. My least favourite event of the week occurred yesterday when my attending asked me to check proprioception on a patient. I looked at him like I had no idea what proprioception even was, let alone how to test it! Sloooow brain. Ugh.

I feel so lucky and blessed to have been able to carry this little guy around for 36 weeks. I can’t express how thankful I am of the fact that each and every doctor’s appointment is so routine and free of complications that they are downright bor-ing. How could I ask for a better pregnancy?? My mama passed along some good baby-carrying genes! Thank heaven!

At 37 weeks, they consider the baby officially “full term”… It’s inevitable! The day is coming closer!

Yes, we are still working on the US residency thing. Our next step should be the interview, which I kinda wish would happen while I’m 8 months pregnant… : )

The 60-day timeline they quote is nice because I would really love to have this all sorted out before interviews finish this fall/winter and rank order lists are submitted by medical school residency programs in February. After speaking with a few programs at the Family Medicine conference and researching information online, it is clear that having a permanent resident green card goes a LONG way to improving the chances of an IMG matching in a US program.

I find it slightly ironic that at the pace this process is moving, our son will have a US Social Security Number before I do!

Since I shared my Step 1 report, I figured I could post these as well.

The top part correlates to my performance on the Clinical Skills (CS) exam in Houston. The bottom displays how well I did in each section of the Clinical Knowledge exam. You can see my Renal/Urinary score improved a lot from Step 1, but what the heck happened with Immunology??

I think it’s funny to see that my Professional Manner is better than my Spoken English and I have no idea how anyone can score well on Data Gathering with the time constraints on the clinical encounter.

At any rate, all of those fancy X’s mean I’ve successfully completed 3 out of 4 parts of the United States Medical Licensing Exam. Step 3 will come sometime next year. Hopefully after I have landed a Real Residency Job with a Real Residency Paycheck.

Me: “It was a good night last night. I only got up three times to pee.”
Brandon: “You’re going to be so good at this middle-of-the-night baby thing.”

Maybe because Brandon is currently on his OB/GYN rotation and has labour & delivery stories every day when we get home… but I think this is the first week I’m starting to think (and get nervous!) about the physical process of labour. I mean, I’ve always known the pain was inevitable, but now it’s becoming really real.

Pushing this baby out is really going to hurt!

Yesterday we received yet another amaaazing care package from Brandon’s parents. This one was filled with clothes and shoes from when he was a baby! His mom carefully saved and cleaned everything. Believe it or not, there is even a tiny pair of scrubs! This photo shows how much Nebraska’s Lil’ Red has changed over the years.

I survived my first belly mauling this week. I was accosted by a nurse I work with on a daily basis and probably would have been more prepared to fend off the attack if it had been a complete stranger. Still, she caught me off guard and asked if the baby was “awake.” I said “he’s not moving right now” and she proceeded to see if she could figure out where his little bum and head were. Weird.

I think she realized it was weird too and apologized as she backed off. So, I decided not to punch her in the face after all.

My ankles are getting better. But I can still hardly believe how hot it is. The heat has really zapped my appetite and I feel like my weight has leveled off recently. Instead of consistently gaining a pound each week, I’ve been about the same for the past three weeks. Still no stretch marks either! WHOOHOO!

It’s been awhile since I’ve posted a random daily update blah-blah post. But this was a little too long for twitter, so here I am.

Finishing up week two of my Neurology rotation today. Just about anyone that has followed this blog for any length of time knows how much I love the brain. I’m sort of surprised at my love-hate relationship with the rotation so far. Some things I LOVE LOVE and other things I just couldn’t picture doing for the rest of my life. Definitely the hardest part about being a neurologist in a hospital setting is having to tell loved ones over and over and over that their family member no longer has any meaningful brain activity. After all, if neurology is called on an ICU consult, it usually isn’t a good thing.

In fact, one of the physical therapists has come to recognize me and when he sees me looking at the chart of a patient he is scheduled to work with, he realizes they probably won’t be up to the task that day.

Partly because I always strive to do my best and partly because this particular attending is challenging, this rotation is working me pretty hard. Surprisingly hard. I got home at 8pm last night and haven’t even given email barely a glance all week. Thankfully, it’s Neurology. I don’t think I could keep up this level of stamina all month if it was a subject I didn’t totally love.

And thankfully, it’s Friday. Even though I have a ton of articles to write this weekend, I am looking forward to not getting out of my pajamas unless absolutely necessary.

But first! Today Brandon and I are headed to Babies ‘R Us to finally pick up our crib and changing table! By the end of the weekend, The Office might actually look like The Baby Room! So fun!

Well, it’s the middle of August. Which means you have probably already received your token and registered with ERAS. Now it’s time to register with NRMP.

ERAS stands for Electronic Residency Application System and is the online software responsible for taking care of your personal statement, photo, CV details, MSPE (Dean’s letter), official transcript and letters of recommendation. Your school will submit the last three. The rest of the application is up to you.

NRMP stands for the National Residency Matching Program and is the governing-organizing-electronic-doo-hickey application that sorts through all applicants and residency positions with a fancy math algorithm. This year, NRMP registration opens on Sunday, August 15th.

Each of these steps is bringing us closer to the end of summer and closer to the submission of our applications to residency programs! September 1st is just around the corner!